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All extremely valid points — but the book itself, “Love in the Time of Algorithms: What Technology Does to Meeting and Mating,” is actually more nuanced, objective, wide-ranging and inclusive.
In the book, Slater writes, “As the world adjusts to the new reality that technology provides, many traditions and taboos surrounding meeting and mating are on their way out, and more will likely fall, replaced by whichever new theories of relationship happiness win out in a marketplace of possibilities that never in history has been so vast,” he continues.
They’re looking to see if they want to spend their time, energy and money on the other person, Fisher explained. And then not just how they make love, but whether they got a sense of humor, whether they’re patient, whether they can listen,” Fisher said.
; after the date, both spill the night’s details to a reporter, judging their companions on everything from body weight to tolerance for “that’s what she said” jokes.
The casual hookup site, however, has to date people of mixed races, although blacks are the majority.
”In the excerpt, Slater doesn’t answer these questions conclusively, but he does give an example of a young man who feels that online dating has encouraged him to play the field, and he quotes a dating site exec who wonders whether the efficiency of Web matchmaking will make marriage “obsolete.” In this day and age, them’s still fighting words, and the Atlantic knew it.
The magazine’s website was quick to host a handful of responses to Slater’s piece, as writers all over the Web piled on.
The arguments were varied — that people use dating sites for love, not sex, that the experience of it makes them long even more for commitment, that online dating is not nearly as fun as Slater’s experts suggest, that modern relationships would be done “a service” by reducing the pressure to be monogamous and that Slater relied too heavily on the biased source of online dating executives to support his thesis and failed to include quotes from any women, not to mention queer people.
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